Friday, 4 January 2013

My needs come first... period

No pictures please.. and no whining when I tell you NO!

Being a Fem & Findomme sounds like a fun lifestyle to some residents, but it's not always that fun. On a search for the perfect fit when it comes to submissives you will find a lot of "Whiners" .. peope who are appearantly into the scene for the wrong reason or think they are submissive but really are trying to Top from the Bottom.

In my world a submissive is a person who finds satisfaction in making me his/her number one priority and puts aside his/her own needs when I need them too, taking their limits in regard ofcourse. 

To often I meet subs who I file under "attention whore"
They do not want to put my needs first, they want to be cared for like a child and start whining when you tell them "I do not have time for you right now" Funny thing is that most, when we talk about limits and what I expect of them, fully agree that we are not going to spend 24/7 together. To make any D/s relationship work it should be based on honesty and communication. Never make promises you can't keep. And if for some reason you can not live with the agreements made, a sub should talk to their Mistress, not run away or use what I like to call "emotional pressure"

I never go out looking for submissives, they find me. They come to me for their need (which is to let another being take control over their life), not the other way around.  Ignoring or deciding not to want to spend time with a submissive also is a form of control, but unfortunately a form not many SL subs can deal with.

I'm always very clear on what kind of Goddess I am. Sexual domination is part of my lifestyle but not the main priority. Sexual domination includes domination a sub sexually most likely with some BDSM but like  time and attention, witholding sexual acts is also a form of control and again a lot of subs I meet love the BDSM but go whining when you withold them from any.

Regardless of what a sub may think I am their Goddessat all times, If I see fit to give any sub my time and attention I will decide when and how this will happen.